Warning: child ment
Hi everyone. I'm once again starting down the DE path. I know many people, myself included, are looking for a donor, and the donor's family, to have a "clean bill of health." But, in actually poring over donor profiles, I'm finding that it's getting harder for me to determine what that really means to me in practice, and what I am willing to live with, so to speak.
For example, there are 2 donors I was looking at, both of whom seemed good matches for me and my DD (who was conceived w/my OE and DS) in many ways. However, their health histories seemed pretty grim. One, in addition to having had a bout of chlamydia herself, has one grandparent who had diabetes, and who died of a massive stroke/brain aneurysm, and another grandparent who had ovarian cancer and Alzheimer's. The other has a grandparent who has/had breast cancer, and another grandparent w/osteoporosis and Alzheimer's, plus a brother with rheumatoid arthritis, and parents w/kidney stones and gallstones. Both donors also have family members who have had lung cancer or emphysema (in each case the donor attributes this to smoking).
I know that everyone has *something* bad running in their family - and my own family's history is pretty grim when I think about it. And I know that for the younger donors, things may not have even turned up yet in their also young families.
But, since with your OE you don't get to choose, and w/DE you do, where do you draw the line in terms of what types of medical problems you are willing to take a chance on? Any thoughts or guidance would be much appreciated - TIA!