Hi...I'm more of a lurker than a poster but I really need some support at the moment.
This is my 5th IVf cycle- Never once had anything but BFN\'s
I'm 7DP5DT this time. We transferred 4 this time- 2 blasts...2 almost blasts. This was my first 5 DT all were 3DT up until now.
My beta is Friday. I started to POAS with Dollar Store tests at 5dp5dt and it's been BFN...so far.
I know it is still early and there probably is some small glimmer of hope...I'm just not feeling it, especially in light of my history.
The odds are not in my favor and I'm starting to feel like AF is coming anyway. I'm super emotional, crying at the drop of a hat. I've been crampy on and off and my ovaries are throbbing something awful.
I'm not sure I can do this again if it is negative.... for a variety of reason. Mentally I am shot.....I like to believe I am a strong person but IVF is enough to take down even the strongest. Physically, every cycle I do gets worse and worse, not to mention the cyst aspirations in between cycles. I've used up the majority of my sick time at work.... I feel like I'm a disappointment to my superior officers. I'm distracted, which when working on law enforcement is not a good thing.
I'm not even sure what is the next step for us....DE/DS is not an option we will consider.A gestational surrogate is probably the next logical step but it seems so overwhelming, I don't even know where to begin....
I hope that my beta on Friday proves me wrong. I just don't believe it will.