Loss ment.
I am really struggling, trying to keep an open mind and would welcome your honest feedback. I am 41 and my DH (also 41), we have been fighting infertility since we started trying to have a baby when we were 28. we have been through 5 ivf cycles and have 2 beautiful DS's to show for it. We went for our last cycle in jan and it worked, but we lost our beautiful baby girl at 21 weeks and are both absolutely heart broken. Before we lost her I was on cloud 9 feeling like we had weathered the IVF storm and made it through to the other side, broke, but successful - we always wanted 3 kids. It has only been 3 weeks since we lost her - so the wounds are fresh, but I can hear the clock ticking if we are going to try again. I believe DH wants to be done with IVF and enjoy the family we have - although he hasn't said it. I feel greedy, but feel like I can't be done and want to cycle again even though I know the odds are SO horribly stacked against us at this age. We have to pay out of pocket, which I don't care about but DH does - we don't have the money, but could put it on credit. My biggest worry is that I would lose another baby, or not be able to produce normal eggs (DE would not be an option) . . . . DH and I are very close and will talk about this, but sort of agreed to wait until after next monday which is my follow up appt with OB to get his input. It is all I can think about. I have lived and breathed IVF for 13 years and was so happy to put it all behind me - I just can't believe this has happened and am feeling so very sad and empty.
Lucky