Hey all- some of you have read and posted with me before, Siggghhhhh..
I was thinking hard about donor embryo- and then decided I would go for donor egg, i have figured out the finances- have enough money to do one at a good clinic with success rates around 70-75%, costs 20k, anonymous donor.
I have already had my consult, mock transfer, have my psych eval scheduled- just need a few labs repeated- on the wait list for a match- could be within the month or 2. Could cycle by nov- jan.
Last night- i just starting thinking again- about the stress of "doing" an IVF cycle- having a donor doesn't really decrease the stress for me- i would still be worrying about how she did on the drugs, how many follies, how many eggs retrieved- how many of them my dh"s pitiful sperm would fertilize- IF we would get 2 good blasts for transfer or anything to freeze- still faced with the possibility of using donor sperm, then the whole 2 ww, and on and on. Not to mention the 20k price tag and possibly only getting 2 good blasts if we are lucky- and STILL get a bfn, I would then be 65K in debt just this year for fertility treatment.
My other option- Donor embryo- from our good clinic with FET success rate of 43% from donor egg cycles- they gurantee 2 excellent blasts- and on day of thaw if they aren't excellent they will unthaw 2 more to gurantee u get 2 great ones- all for 5k. You know the drill - take bcp, take lupron, do a trigger- hope for a good lining- go in - transfer and wait- to me SOOOOO much less stressful than the DE route.
I know _ giving up the genetic connection- but really I am thinking I JUST DON"T CARE- my dh doesn't care- when I ask him he says- IT"S NOT UP TO ME- i think he prefers donor embryo simply b/c it is only 5 k- we could do 4 donor embryo cycles for the cost of 1 fresh donor egg cycle.
Any advice or thoughts- I really thought I had this figured out-but i have NOONE In the real world to talk to about this and I am feeling so ill. I want to move on, I want a baby, I want one Now. Oh why can't one fall into my lap??
Jen