my husband and i have been told to stop drinking and smoking (he smokes, i don't and we both like the odd drink) prior to being on the NHS waiting list for ivf, and the private clinic we're looking into told us the odd 1 or 2 a week is ok.
i have a problem though - my husband hasn't stopped drinking. sure, he's drank less, but then on a friday or saturday, he'll have some beers. by some i mean like 4-5. he's cut down on his smoking as he hopes to quit, but it's just really hard for him.
i haven't really drank since we were told, i've had one beer on the odd friday, but nothing more than that.
i'm just really worried that he's ruining our chances of getting pregnant, all because he can't say no to a drink. it's really upsetting me as i know it takes 3 months for healthy sperm to replenish, and our next app is in one month.
everytime i mention to him about the drinking/smoking, it ends up causing an argument, as he says we can't do this, we can't do that, is there anything we CAN do? so i think he's getting stressed.
we're going to be having a few drinks at a party in a couple of weeks, and he said that there's no point in us stopping drinking before then if we're going to be drinking at the party, but then we'll not be drinking after the party up until our app to go on the NHS waiting list.
i just don't know what to say or do with him, i feel like he's messing up our chances of having a family. i'm angry with him for not being able to put the drink/cig down and say no, we need all the help we can get.
what can i say to him without it causing an argument?