*pregnancy loss mentioned*
It seems that the last thread has gone quiet, so I thought I would start a new one. I was trying to get into a cycle thread on another board in IVFC, but realized that I just couldn't stomach it when someone mentioned baby dust yesterday... And I really need some vet support as I go through this all.
I officially started my FET cycle today - day 23, Lupron injections starting tonight. I picked up my meds at the pharmacy like it was old hat, grabbing a sharps container from the shelf but ignoring the alcohol wipes because I still have a box at home. It's been exactly 10 weeks since I discovered that my son William no longer had a heartbeat at my 29 week checkup. I know that this is fast and I'm most definitely still intensely grieving, but I just feel compelled to start again as soon as possible. I've spoken with another woman who had a stillbirth many years ago and she said the same exact thing - of course, she just had to have sex to get pregnant again - lucky her.
I guess I'm in for a rocky month or so. Next week is William's due date, the following week is my sister's scheduled c-section - she's having a boy. We're very close - possibly closer since this awful unfolding of events. She and her husband just asked me last week if I would allow them to give their son the middle name Liam, in honor of William. I was so touched and of course said yes. The transfer will happen the week after Thanksgiving. I really hope that I have something to be thankful for, because the rest of this year has been a bit of a bust. At the very least I'm thankful that I will be able to drink on Thanksgiving day - possibly heavily.
I only have one embryo on ice, so my chances of success are quite low. As it was, the embryologist was surprised when this one did make it to blast (3BA). So I try to keep saying to myself this is only a trial run before my last IVF with my OE, don't get my hopes up, but who am I kidding. I already know the EDD.
Nothing else to add. I'm kind of thinking this day might be a wash from a work youngihmspective. After typing that all up I just want to crawl into bed and sleep the rest of the day away. It's chilly and grey outside - good day for it.