Hey- I wanted to start a post for those of us who have had multiple cycles- not 1st timers- b/c I just can't handle the \"babydust\" and optimism that comes with the 1st and even 2nd time cycler.
With that said \"SUCCESS MENTIONED\" if u don't want to post with me.
I was lucky to get success in the beginning of my ivf journey b/c we started with just severe MFI- but have since had a horrific cycle cx day of trigger with poor response, pregnancy with twins with hearbeats that both died at 9 weeks, found out I have ovarian failure at just turned 34 and told to move onto donor egg, had another cycle at bigger, better clinic, new protocol, and thru in donor sperm WORST cycle ever, BFN- only got 3 mature eggs.
Now I am moving onto donor egg and hopefully will be matched by october and start cycling in nov/ dec.
I am excited to move on, but I am also a little bit snarky. I understand the new \"excitement and fear\" of new ivfr's but find I am a little bit to \"real\" or even \"bitter\" yeah that is a good word, bitter about ivf, and infertility. No bad thoughts to anyone who has to go thru ivf, it sucks for all, but just at a different place emotionally b/c of my bad luck.
Hope someone out there can relate to me and join me over the next few months. I am said over the 40k I have spent just this year for nothing, sad for the loss of my babies, and sad for the loss of having a biological child at such a \"young\" age- I know very relative.
I am excited and optimistic about DE but also so scared it too won't work and I will have spent another 21k. I will be broke at that point.
So anyone who wants to join me, have a lot of drinks b/w now and then, come on!!!!!!
Jen